Anchoring is the process of associating an internal response or feeling with an external trigger. This allows to you to quickly access a feeling.
The trigger may be a sound, image, touch, smell or taste to trigger a consistent response in you or someone else.
Anchoring in a feeling is something that we all do with each other all the time. It starts when we’re babies and your mum rocks you to sleep while possibly singing or talking to you. Over time, that feeling of being rocked with the sound of your mums voice, anchors in the feeling of comfort and sleepiness.
When your child falls over, you pick them up, give them and hug and use a comforting tone of voice. As that happens throughout their childhood, you are anchoring in that feeling of security. Even as they grow up and go through difficult times like a first heart break, your voice will still make them feel better and feel like they will be ok.
We all have anchors without even realising. It may be the smell of perfume that brings back the feeling of a particular time in our lives, or a particular song that makes us feel like we’re back at a festival again and gives us goosebumps. We might have a particular chair that we sit in that we have anchored a feeling of relaxation into. We can also have negative anchors that can bring back a feeling of panic or fear.
We are anchoring feelings unintentionally all the time. We can also intentionally anchor in a feeling that will be helpful to us.
Towards the end of my sessions with clients, I like to give them an anchor for confidence and calm. All we need to do is elicit the emotion, set up a physical anchor (often a finger and thumb held together) and use a particular trigger word.
Any feeling that you can elicit, you can create an anchor for. This could be for fearlessness, determination, joy, love, peace. You can even anchor a feeling into an object so that you feel confidence when you pick up the phone. For sports performance you can anchor the feeling of focus or being in ‘the ‘zone’ when you put on your football boots, pick up your hockey stick or put on your helmet.
Anchoring is a great technique to use with kids and we can use it covertly without them even realising. Wait until they are in a state of calm or happiness and when you see them in this state, place your hand on their shoulder and say a word to them. If you do this over a period of time, eventually you will have anchored that feeling into that touch and that word.
So, why not give it a try yourself. The next time you’re in a really good mood, remember to anchor it. After doing this a number of times, when you’re not feeling so good, you can use the anchor and trigger that feeling.